Willkommen zu dem, was in Worten gesagt werden kann, auf einer virtuellen Seite, diese langen Tage und ewig langen Nächte gehen, für immer unendlich die Schleife entfaltet.
Eva Winterschön

prose

Komplexität ist ein System, sagte der Architekt komplexer Systeme, über alle Epochen.

    😴 Dreaming of Aliyah 😴

    Ongoing day-dreaming and pre-nap thoughts on the too-many relocation events from the past two decades… every time another move transpires I get a bit closer to just saying,

    “Fine, I get the message. it’s finally time for Aliyah (עֲלִיָּה).”

    Like many aspects of my internal life and its intrinsic amalgam of disparate identity qualifiers, I’ve only very recently shared anything publicly about being a Jew. Mostly due to that side of my reality being forcefully kept a secret by strict Catholic bullshit (no point in using nicer terms).

    Long story short, via genetic testing I was able to find the other half of my real family, connect with them, and concurrently find long-awaited answers to medical realities; endured in similarly unknown silence due to socioreligious disdain.

    So then, maybe one day I’ll get on with aliyah. It would feel correct to complete this near-endless cycle by leaving Saṃsāra for Samaria.

    #aliyah #jüden #jewish #genetics #israel

    💖 Siren Song of the UltraSparc 💖

    02:42, awoken to first-morning, 4hrs sleep
02:55, at home office standing desk
02:58, navigate to eBay once more
02:59, search Sparc M7 T7-2 chassis
03:08, begin writing silly poem
03:12, resume eBay search
03:16, distracted by dtrace for tcshrc
03:20, distracted by view of Lake Michigan
03:22, return to Mastodon post-form
03:28, distracted by tcsh config options
03:32, review work emails, updates too
03:44, move poem to 'nb' program
03:50, resume timeline planning for work
04:30, paste to micro-blog, click 'post'

nocturn lucid state of mind, nor-aware
to this living within, this living dream
a call from asunder, singly sweet it rings
t'was on the waves first heard 'n thought seen
thirty-two cores, two-sockets she breathes
.. "come home my love, come rescue me" ..

perhaps one day or night so-soon 'oy-veh!
dare say those waves may calm her songs
an UltraSparc M7, no-more! no-less! yes yes!
to dream of reveling in radiance so pure 'n fast
'naught from those worlds above 'agast

her wrists s'o slight, no strength for grasps
t'was decades ago, burning searing flesh
she spoke no words to jest, nor loving gasps
her scar a wound - a warning forever to last

fünf Buchstaben besagen, the letters extolled
"come down from clouds ne' stray to golds!"
'a singing singeing salaciousness unfolds
"ye' now Icara, auf'dem lofty piercing blue!"
"whence must you crash? no less'n to bruise!"

    Before Death, The Experiences Adventure

    Fulfilling one’s “Promises of Adventure” from 1999, one place I’d like to visit and to attend involves seeing an ‘Astral Projection’ dj set performed in the existential-perceptual-wilderness of the Negev desert, southern Israel.

    As a former long-term resident of the often bleak Nevada desert landscapes, it was a perpetual joy to explore the ancient remnants of the Great Inland Sea, the expansive sky-islands of the Great Basin Montane Forests, the ultra-hardened remote Salt Flats, as well as the more commonly experienced playa comprised of Alkali Flats in the Black Rock Desert (where Burning Man is held) - one of the largest flat stretches of land in our world - so expansive that it can be easily recognized from the International Space Station.

    I’ve always been drawn to the remoteness, the endlessness, as well as an active expression of a functional-inhumanity which pervades every stretch of landscape in those uninhabited realms. I’ve nearly died in these deserts on several occasions over a period of decades, not from lack of preparedness, but simply because these are inhospitable extremes which the human body was never made to survive or endure. From the lesser-known snow storms of its lonely winters to the ripping sun-bleached dehydrated winds of summer, the desert has always felt like home.

    The Negev Desert is home to the oldest discovered surface on Earth, at 1.8 million years… it calls to the soul, a yearning which may only temporarily satiate the need for more. I want to touch its ancient landscapes, to persist in nothingness, to lay face up and sleep through its endless night, never again returning alone to/or/from The Voids of death.